How to Be the Perfect Host

 I love hosting friends and family. My parents knew how to throw an epic party and I have inherited that desire to make people feel excited when they receive an invitation from me. From huge themed parties to simple suppers I delight in the details which can elevate an event. So, if you too want to be the host(ess) with the most(ess) here are a few tips learned over decades.

Think about your mix of people. If you are like me you probably have a mix of people you'd like to invite to things from a range of backgrounds. But will Bob from the office enjoy meeting Ethel from your crochet group? You can bit cliquey when it comes to things like dinner parties ensuring everyone knows at least one other person and ideally, they all will have some common interests. For bigger events you can mix it up a little more.

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Food and Drink. Personally I think refreshments are crucial to the success of any event. A courtesy query at the end of any invite means you will cater for all needs. Yes, Lily may not have been vegan last time she came round and you had no idea Nick needs to avoid acidic food now so ask even if you've hosted these people previously. 

I always try to over-cater slightly. I'd rather a little was left than people go away wanting more. Since Covid we've realised that the company is more important than the menu so if you hate fancy food or cant afford expensive ingredients its perfectly fine to offer a simple dish like pasta or shepherds pie or bangers and mash. People are mostly just happy to be invited and to not have to cook!

Sort out Your Space.  If you are planning a BBQ make sure you have enough chairs and tables for people to be able to sit if they want to. Not everyone can balance a burger and beer while standing. In the UK I'd recommend planning a shelter - pop-up gazebos are great and you could ask your friends or neighbours of they have one you can borrow if you don't want to buy one. 

I love hosting dinner parties, Sunday lunches and casual suppers and part of the fun for me is making sure the area we eat is attractive and comfortable. Make sure you have enough dining room seating for all your guests leaving enough elbow room to actually eat. Use candles, fresh flowers or foliage, table gifts, seashells, pretty stones, crystals and quartz, battery powered lights or even driftwood to make your dining table interesting and attractive. My friend Karen is the queen of table decor and her efforts always make a meal special.

Be clear with your invitation. State when and where the event is, who exactly is invited (children, plus ones, babes in arms for instance) and if there's a dress code or theme. I personally think it's OK to ask people to contribute. Bring a bottle, bring a salad, bring a pud for example. Sometimes I state, bring what you like to drink which is perfect if some like a specific wine, spirit or soft drink. However make sure you have enough to go round without relying on your guest's gifts.

Enjoy yourself! Make sure you build in time to spend time with your guests and enjoy the event yourself. I like to make at least part of the food in advance and have been known to delegate manning the BBQ to my children or even keen guests. Accept offers of help serving or clearing and remember your friends and family have come to spend time with you not to listen to you frantically washing up in the next room.

So there you have it. My short guide to throwing the perfect party. However, some of the best parties are less than perfect - they are messy, noisy and even if the food turned out badly everyone had fun - that is the aim after all.