Friday, 28 June 2013

I don't remember.....

Remember me? Or still trying
to  forget?
The concept of a friend is a tricky one isn't it? How long is someone your friend before they are a friend or still an acquaintance? Or is it about how much info/life/stress/time together you share?

Some friends you keep in touch with for a short while - while a child is in playgroup, Brownies, swimming club, while you work with them, even for those few days in hospital post baby when you seem to get to know people intimately - maybe a little too intimately at times as you hear their entire medical history through a thin curtain!

Others - and I have written about this before - seem to always be in your life. Waxing and waning maybe as you or they move away, go through a different life stage to you or just a busy life intervenes.
This week DH and I finally met up with some friends we have known for decades but haven't seen for ages. He was our best man, she helped a Black Country girl feel less lonely in her new Home Counties life while our husbands toured Europe with their work.

They are grandparents now- my youngest has yet to start school. None of us work in the same industry any more. But still on the rare occasions we manage to synchronise diaries the chat is as lively as if we met only last week.

This week on unfeasibly high stools in a packed pub we chatted about how weird it is how your brain fails to get to grips with the idea that obviously as time passes, your friends age. Simple yes?
But we all had tales to tell of visiting our home towns and wondering why we never saw anyone we knew-  until we realised we were looking for the 16-year-old version of the person we knew, who let's face it has a good chance of nowadays being fat, bald and dressed like a middle aged man. And that's just the women!

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 (Photo credit: FindYourSearch)
Facebook is great for helping out here. Names from Secondary School often pop up - so-and-so wants to be your friend - and I'm embarrased to say half the time I can't put a face to the name.
So like most people I'm sure I have a quick guilty peek at their profile photos and if I still don't recognise them I trawl further into their albums hoping they've scanned in some pictures  from the 80's!
This kind of exercise can be a great morale booster when you realise that the popular girls have maybe not worn so well as you thought. And lots of the ugly ducklings really did turn into swans! I'm still waiting....

Our friends this week told an anecdote about visiting their old school where one of them bumped into an old classmate and told her DH she was there. "Where?" he asked scouring the area.  Of course, the 40-something friend from the past who oddly no longer wore a school uniform was standing right in front of him.

I have in fact scanned some old, crumpled and faded pictures into my albums on Facebook to help people remember me.Though I'm guessing with my unusual name (which is obviously not actually madmumof7 but equally mad-thanks mu) and the fact that I've always been a bit odd might mean I'm a bit unforgettable anyway. I just hope it's unforgettable in a nice way.

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1 comment:

I'd love feedback- but keep it clean and kind.