How my son's illness strengthened my faith.

Regular readers will know I am a practicing Christian (I need to practice!) and this week I have had to draw hard on my faith as my beloved ginger fat boy, DS#3, has been in hospital.

It looks like my gorgeous, bouncy, loving 9-year-old may well have epilepsy - he has had ever increasing episodes of what I will describe as "strange symptoms" to cut a long story short.

I had taken him to the GP a couple of weeks ago and he was in the process of being referred when he had a particularly long and scary episode which prompted me to take him to A & E.

Luckily (and I use the work loosely!) he had another "complex partial seizure" in the paediatric decisions unit just as the doctor assessing him was about to leave. They quickly hooked him up for some obs during the "event" and admitted him overnight.

 In typical DS#3 style our son was thrilled with the chance to eat Weetabix at midnight (although he was less keen on the needles!) I was beyond exhausted when we finally got to the ward at 2am.

Being admitted at least speeded up the referral - we saw a consultant next morning and we are now waiting for an MRI and EEG to confirm the diagnosis and give the doctors more information about what's causing the seizures. presumably we will then start on the road of finding out which meds or diet or whatever will help control his seizures.

Anyway. That's not really the point of this post. The point is that as soon as news got out about DS#3 I had lots of offers of help and messages of support and love and prayers, offers of childcare and cake.

Now, as an active Christian who even explored the possibility of ordination for a while I am very aware of my responsibility to serve, to share Gods love and to help people regardless of faith or belief. And this Sunday in church we sang a hymn which bolsters me in my resolve (and makes me cry!) every time I sing it.

It's number 332 in the Complete Anglican Hymns Old and New:



"I will hold your people in my heart" really speaks to me. I have heard Him calling in the night and I have accepted that I will go, if He leads me, wherever I need to go to do whatever I need to do.

I try (and try is all we can do) to live my life "living God's Love" and what was extraordinary was that I saw this from the other side this week as people reached out to me in my hour of need.

It was wonderful and humbling and made me even more determined to strengthen my relationship with God, to listen carefully to how I can serve and to celebrate the opportunity for joy which came out of such sorrow in the hospital.

To all who offered help and support, thank you. To those who pray, please add my son to your prayers. And to those that don't believe in such things, keep fingers crossed, knock on wood or think positive thoughts. I think it's going to be a tough few months emotionally as we come to terms with whatever ails our son, and cope with the physical and financial implications as we have to add travel to hospitals and implement new rules to live by into our already stretched budget and routine so we will accept all the support and love we can get!

I don't aim to offend anyone by writing about my faith. If you don't share my beliefs that is obviously fine but I hope that you will respect my right to believe and not leave malicious or contentious comments on my blog. Let's all rub along together agreeing to disagree where necessary please lovely people. Afra xxx

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